The hardest part of the day

Oh man. I get home from work, it's already dark, because it gets dark early now, and I just want COMFORT!

For years comfort has meant food, lots of it, and some sort of visual distraction, namely television. So, I don't have television anymore, and I totally do not miss it, but I keep myself quite distracted enough with Netflix, and now I don't even have to wait for the dvds to get here because there is all kinds of crap Netflix will let me watch for free! ANYway.

Right now I am feeling my itchy soul. Pema Chodron teaches about the itch of our ego, the strong need we have to scratch these places in our souls. And we scratch by eating, shopping, sex, food, alcohol, whatever, and right now I really want to scratch. But the instruction is to sit with the feeling, to feel the feeling. I am to breathe and face the feeling. My goal, to become completely familiar with my emotions and feelings.

I don't want to sit. I want to eat.

Plus I am "feeling" ravenous. And, I think it might be because I ate breakfast. Another great recipe from Escape from Obesity, (http://escapefromobesity.blogspot.com/ ) pumpkin oatmeal! I ate a serving, but it was a lot of food, this morning, when I usually go out without eating breakfast. I know, everyone says it's the most important meal of the day. But, if I can get out of the house without eating, and if I don't WANT to eat, then I think that is a good thing. Fewer calories I will eat for the day. Then again, maybe not. Maybe breakfast really does start our motors and we really do burn more calories BECAUSE we ate breakfast. Who knows?

My aspiration: I wish to know happiness and the root of happiness:)